Post-trauma fear cripples rape survivor's life
Source: Hueiyen News Service / Thingnam Anjulika Samom
Imphal, November 23 2014:
The suspicion emanating from the petite figure of the "U-Morok trader" seated huddled up on the bed, a woolen shawl wrapped tightly around her body, was apparent, making the initial conversation awkward.
She opens up slowly, "It was a story of just a few minutes of a night, but after that I lost everything.
I was a happy person but now I cannot sing; I didn't know how to cry before, never feared death, but now my legs go weak and I cry at the slightest thing" .
The words came faster as anger reawakened, "That year, the price of chilli was very low.
I usually sold the ginger, chilli or banana produce from my fields to the traders who come to my village.
I thought if I sell it myself in the market my profit margin would be more," she said.
Turning to me, she added, "You see, I had to pay the school and hostel fees for my four children.
I had given only a partial amount to the headmaster and begged him to let me pay the rest soon after I sold the chilli.
I do not habitually go in the night or travel far alone.
But I was with my brother-in-law.
I thought I was safe.
How was I to know such a thing would happen!" .
The "U-morok trader" was coming from a village in Tamenglong district in a timber-laden truck driven by her brother-in-law in March 2012.At Keinou, about 30km from Imphal, they were waylaid by four persons including two IRB jawans, who beat up her brother-in-law and taking her to a nearby school campus, gang-raped her.
"They first charged me of smuggling contraband items, and said they were taking me to the police station.
They drove around in the dark.
After sometime, they said that we had reached Mayang Imphal and they were going to rape me," she recalled.
What followed was a labyrinthine round of police station, NGOs and court as she strove for justice.
"God saved me that night.
They did their bad deed with me, but my life was spared.
Maybe because God wanted that I should teach them a lesson." Luck was on her side as the Delhi Nirbhaya rape case had highlighted the need for speeding up such cases in the court.
In June, 2013, her four rapists �Rojit, Bijen, Ibomcha, and Kenedy -- were sentenced by an Imphal court to life imprisonment for gang rape.
They were also sentenced to three years for assault, 10 years for kidnapping, and 10 years for highway robbery.
However, what now dogs her mind is constant worry about the future and crippling fear of retribution.
"I don't want to go out of my house, even to go to the fields.
There could be informers.
Sometime back, some army and IRB asked the villagers whether the u-morok trader lived here and they said yes.
I was so angry to hear that, and also very fearful.
What if they come to harm me again after they come out of jail," she said.
"Recently I had alongwith some villagers gone to the hills to gather plants for making brooms.
I was working in a corner and suddenly two of my neighbours approached me from behind a clump of bushes.
I panicked thinking it was those bad men come to rape me again, and I swung my thang at them and started attacking them.
They thought I was going mad," she narrated.
This fear has threatened to take over her future as well.
"I see them in my dream, sometimes even when I am awake.
I can't sleep at nights thinking I can't go freely to earn for my children; I will be unable to educate them so that they are in a better position than where their parents are" .
A self-sustaining person, now she finds herself dependent on others.
"I was in Imphal most of the time during the case, too afraid to go back.
When I returned I found that my ginger harvest was all gone � most of it had rotted, some stolen and the rest strewn about by animals.
When I saw it, I sat down and cried.
I didn't earn for about two years.
From where do we eat � we sold our two buffaloes and many other household items.
We relied on our relatives," she narrated.
An additional burden is societal stigma.
"People talk behind my back, I get to hear about it too.
When I am neat and tidy, when I smile, they say, she shouldn't do that, after what had happened? When I go out, they say, she goes out that is why it happened.
Why blame me? They should know that it was not my fault.
If it was, why would I talk about it, go to the police or the court?" she fumed.
Her eyes misting over she continued, "Now people point fingers at me and say, why did she go in the night? Don't the mothers of Manipur travel in the night to sell their vegetables in the market?" .
A related issue is that of her physical and mental health condition.
"I was never ill my whole life.
I gave birth to my children on my own, and would get up and work as soon as I delivered them.
Work was my therapy, I had no illness.
But now, I have headache, bodyache and feel fatigued all the time.
Doctor says don't think too much and give me vitamins.
But that doesn't help me, how can I not think?" she asked.
In a 2007 article "Rape-related PTSD: Issues and interventions" published in Psychiatric Times Dean G.Kilpatrick and others stated that "Rape and sexual assault represent one of the most common precipitating events for PTSD in women." Kilpatrick who is Professor of Clinical Psychology and Director of the National Crime Victims Research and Treatment Center (NCVC), under the Department of Psychiatry and Behavioral Sciences at the Medical University of South Carolina, is part of a nationwide survey of 4008 women of the United States entitled "The National Women's Study" undertaken between 1995-1996 .
One of the major findings of the National Women's Study is that almost one-third (31%) of all rape victims developed PTSD sometime during their lifetime; and more than one in ten rape victims (11%) still has PTSD today.
Rape victims were three times more likely than non-victims of crime to develop depression.
According to psychiatrist Dr.RK Lenin, startled reaction, fear, insomnia, flashbacks, avoidance, and depression are some of the common reactions of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) brought about by traumatic events such as death or sexual violence.
"Do not think that physical pain is the end, related psychosocial issues are equally important," he advised, adding that regular follow-up and trauma cousnelling will enable a person to lead a normal life again.