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E-Pao! EI - Shanti Thokchom's Life Experiences - 9

Shanti Thokchom's Life Experiences
- Part 9 -
My best and good friend - Boisy Haokip

By: Shanti Thokchom *



Over the years all of us from Nirmalabas school had to go to different schools as it was under construction and sadly we lost contact.

My best and good friend was Boisy Haokip who literally stayed put at our place. She was an only daughter and her brothers always bullied her and so she was always with us.

Her older brother Ngamlal was a big bully. He was never into studies. He always loved to play pranks on us gals and we steered clear of him always!!

I heard from another friend that he has become a reverend of some sorts!! I could not believe it at all!! Maybe he had changed for the better in due course of time!!

I was very devastated by the news of her demise some years ago due to the common social ills of our society...drugs!! I had lost a younger sister to this in the 90s and its very, very painful to lose someone close to you!!

I had attended the wedding reception of Boisy in Kangpokpi Bazar.

Her mom made me say something about our childhood friendship in Kuki language over the microphone! Believe you me, I do not speak the proper Kuki dialect as I did not grow up in a proper Kuki lane or any Leikai. I spoke only the Bazari kind where you can get by!!

I did not expect that microphone deal at all!! Now I was pretty scared because the people in the reception were all directing their gaze at me to see the good friend of Boisy whose mom just handed me the dreaded mike!!

I thought I'll do the needful and quietly slip away in anonimity!! My, gosh! when the mike was thrust at me, I got stage fright and became numb!!

Well I did manage to say in English that I was both happy and sad to be there that day for Boisy's wedding reception!!( happy for her marriage to a good guy but sad to lose her as my friend because she was going to be a wife now and would not have much time for friends as was the norm in society those days).

I just could not make myself speak in Kuki because I knew I was under strict scrutiny from all those gathered there who would be ever ready to shred me to pieces over my spoken Kuki dialect.

I was sweating profusely and nearly wet myself standing in front of the mike !! No one knew what I went though that moment!! How I wished the floor cracked open and I could slide down under!!

It was easier for me to get away with if I spoke in English!! Some good soul in the crowd translated in Kuki for the people !!! and thereafter lots of Wah-wahs and hand clapping in the back ground!!

I did not hear those because I was so relieved that it was over!! I gave Boisy hugs and soon left because I saw some people already approaching towards me to start their usual questioning "Nanu Hoilang Miham? (where is your mom from?)" Napa To Hoiya Kimuto Ham?( How Did Your Folks Meet?).

I have had to answer these ever since I could talk!! Are my folks the only ones to be married from different communities or what?

There are hundreds such cases these days and am pretty sick of answering these questions!! I guess I'll have to just deal with it my whole life!! Our people can be as nosy as can be!! as if thats their mission in their lives!!!!

I happened to meet my friend Boisy's mom in 2002 in Imphal bazar by chance. We could not say anything as we were both crying on the street as soon as she saw me.

She was reminded of her when she saw me. The Manipur Rifles men on duty there on the streets thought that she was sick or something!!

It was a very emotional meeting with her. She had become very disoriented due to her grief at losing her only daughter!!I gave her my address to keep in touch! I cant ever forget her sad face !!



To be continued..........!!


* Shanti Thokchom, a resident of Tulsa, Oklohoma, contributes regularly to e-pao.net . She can be reached at hanubi2006(at)hotmail(dot)com . This article was webcasted on August 17, 2007.


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