Pains
Dr. Nunglekpam Premi Devi *
If only I knew; I'd haven't tasted life for betterment;
If only I had encounter; I'd haven't carrying burden;
'Unification' a legal practice, isn't that wholly without;
Binding 'me' too tightly, norms and regulations;
Rules and cultures, isn't that beauty?
Ah! It's a mere thing 'he' does loving, surprisingly;
Frame work and orders, early morning liveliness;
Constituting bodily work animated, as though;
The 'system' isn't natural, it's framed inducing;
Tired and very tired, I'm to this socially instigation;
Had I ever knew such a wonder encouragement?
Its paining urge, 'you' never notice this system;
Charmer as always wondering visioning;
How faithful 'I' to this patriarchal lines.
Life's a behold miracle; life's a establish distress anguish;
You never discern without recognizing it, sadness;
All I perceived, just a naked truth, liar and unhappiness;
Feel that agony; just sweeten that soreness;
'Boy or Girl', It's a boy! How contented?
Merry making and cheerful and feeling blessed;
Bravo! Everyone greeted, 'you're the man;
Favored and supporting and delighted and willing to;
Had 'they' ever detected 'the pangs of contractions'?
'Laboring' isn't a happy game, its paining achy feeling;
Wondering over again, how 'they' reacted?
'She's a girl' 'she cries whole night';
Recommending 'try one more' child;
How faithful 'I' to this patriarchal lines.
Struggling for living isn't different, when all money matters;
Anger and hypertension, tools I should shelter;
Thought life's an empty darkness and thrilling space;
All well's unwell, lives without fences and boarders;
All I knew, I wasn't knew rubbish joys and freedom;
Overwhelming those empty needful, sticking to same old;
How successful will 'I' become? When he misunderstood;
Weeping my passion; tears my adoring jewelry;
Can't treasured rude and filthiness, never does 'he' listens;
It's hurting, traumatizing and blaming inside 'me';
'Companion' all that matters, unpleasant to habitual tipsy;
Wondering how many unforgettable nights!
Without sleep just waiting, holding a lantern;
It's paining endlessly, throbbing and holding back;
How faithful 'I' to this patriarchal lines.
Life isn't a lesson, experiences make it living;
How exotic 'I' to him?
Duties I carried so hard, never does 'he' understand;
Bearing and rearing, educating and nurturing;
Supporting and raising, breeding and keeping;
All my calling, opening a pursuit to happiness;
Sickening inside 'me' throes and struggling,
And hardening, bravely I does escapade;
Suffering inside 'me' dies, with those jovial playful smiles;
Holding 'me' in restricted paining pride;
How faithful 'I' to this patriarchal lines.
* Poem written by Dr. Nunglekpam Premi Devi for Imphal Times
The writer is an Independent Scholar
This poem was webcasted on February 12 2018.
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