More Than Friends

Bienhome Muivah *

So much is made of the importance of the right kind of friends in the Bible that we can't treat this part of our lives lightly. "A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked leads them astray" (Prov. 12:26). If it's true that we become like the friends we spend time with, then we must select our friends wisely.

The main quality to look for in a close friend is not how attractive, talented, wealthy, smart, influential, clever, or popular they are. It's how much they love and fear God. The person who will do what it takes to live in the perfect will of God is the kind of friend who imparts something for the goodness of the Lord to you every time you are with them.

Seven Good Signs of a Desirable Friends

1.A desirable friend tells you the truth in love. "Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses" (Prov. 27:6).
2.A desirable friend gave you sound advice. "Perfume and incense bring joy to the heart, and the pleasantness of one's friend springs from his earnest counsel" (Prov. 27:9).
3.A desirable friend refines you. "As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend" (Prov. 27:17).
4.A desirable friend helps you to grow in wisdom. "He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed" (Prov. 13:20).
5.A desirable friend stays close to you. "A man who has friends must himself be friendly, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother" (Prov. 18:24).
6.A desirable friend loves you and stands by you. "A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity" (Prov. 17:17).
7.A desirable friend is a help in time of trouble. "Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his
companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help up" (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10).

If you have friends with these qualities, protect those friendships with prayer. If you have friends who have less than desirable qualities, you need to pray about those as well.

Seven Signs of an Undesirable Friends

1.An undesirable friend is immoral and has no regard for others. "I have written to you not to keep company with anyone who is sexually immoral, or covetous, or an idolator, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or an extortioner even to eat with such a person" (I Cor. 5:11).
2.An undesirable friend is changeable and unstable. "Do not associate with those given to change; for their calamity will rise suddenly, and who knows the ruin those two can bring" (Prov. 24:21-22).
3.An undesirable friend is frequently angry. "Make no friendship with an angry man, and with a furious man. Do not go, lest you learn his ways and set a snare for your soul" (Prov. 22:24-25).
4.An undesirable friend gives ungodly counsel. "Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor stands in the path of sinners, nor sits in the seat of the scornful" (Ps. 1:1).
5.An undesirable friend is a lawless unbeliever. "Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?" (2 Cor. 6:14-15).
6.An undesirable person (friend) is a fool. "He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed" (Prov. 13:20).
7.An undesirable friend is irrelevant toward God and His Laws. "I am a companion of all who fear you, and of those who keep your precepts" (Ps. 119:63).

If you have friends with such characteristics as these, ask God to send you new friends while you pray for the old ones to be transformed.

Pray For Your Relationship

Severe injuries to relationships can often be fatal. Even if they aren't completely destroyed, relational injuries can take years to heal. It's easier to protect them in prayer than it is to fix them. The way we learned to cope, survive, or interact in our relationships when we were growing up will be carried with us into adulthood and affect every one of our important or close relationships now.

And it could be exactly how the devil try to destroy them. Ask God to make you a good friend to others and give you a pure and loving heart in all your relationships. Pray especially for the people live with. The Bible says that "every… house devided against itself will not stand" (Mt. 12:25). You can't have peace if you are living in discord with anyone in your home.

Don't leave your relationships to chance. Pray for godly people to come into your life with whom you can connect. Don't force relationships to happen. Pray for them to happen. Then when they do, nurture them with prayer. This doesn't mean you have to have large numbers of friends. There is a great strength in small numbers when the people involved are strong in the Lord. The quality of your relationships is more important than the quantity.

Through your whole life relationships will be crucial to your well-being. It is not emotionally or spiritually healthy to be isolated. Right relationships will enrich and balance you and give you healthy perspective. Godly people will help you walk in the right direction, and the good in them will rub off on you. The quality of your relationships will determine the quality of your life. And this is something worth praying about.

Let's pray for the right and godly friends to come into our lives, to give discernment and strength to separate ourselves from anyone who is not a good influence. For difficult relationships, let's ask God for His peace would reign in them. Pray for relationship with each of our family members and also for those who does not know God. May we mutually raise the standards to which we aspire. May forgiveness and love freely flow in our relationships.

Choose your friends wisely!