Where is your happiness sanctuary ?

Dr Sumedha Kushwaha *

Are we all not in a perennial hustle for seeking refuge in someone or something ? Observe, how we are constantly trying hard to find ourselves, if only, a reflection of our genuine traits or qualities in a human and or any other immaterial object.

We want to find a small home, a safe haven where we feel safe and protected. Human relationships are complex, but if you look at it, if someone makes you feel home, you are more likely to hang out with that person.

Our entire lives are spent in this perpetual quest for find an asylum or making that virtually non-existent happy sanctuary. And in the end, we understand that there is no happiness in the destination. As there is no terminus in life.

Once, while in a conversation with my friend I asked, “Where do you want to settle down?”

The reply changed my life forever- He said, “The world is my house, why settle down ?”

Now that sentence would not make sense to you- because we are all not well travelled. This person after visiting dozens of countries came to a conclusion that geographical or physical boundaries are self-created and usually in the mind. The world is now so connected through transport and technology that you work in one part, study in another and have a family elsewhere.

Yet, after all this knowledge, where do you think we want to live ? Sounds cliché, but yes, we want to live in humans only.

When people care, express love for you, are compassionate and understanding, you will love them more than your own blood.

Yes, it happens, go to an unknown place where you know nobody and see if someone even speaks to you politely, helps you find the way, offers you food- you feel indebted to such people throughout your life. Every time you think of that place, you are most likely to think of those humans rather than the waterfalls, markets, mountains or anything else for that matter.

That’s how the human race grew, as social beings with a sense of community. But there is a dichotomy, where on one hand we want to remain isolated because we do not want to be vulnerable or get hurt yet we want company of like-minded people.

And in that gulf is a place where you find balance between yourself and others. Where there is harmony in the safe haven that you have created for yourself and what you find in others.

When you resonate with someone at a high frequency that you raise your own vibrations, that’s when you understand that being with people is like having a thermometer. When you gauge an energy higher than you or which makes you feel calm-at that level of frequency, observe how there is a transition between your levels of energy and how you tweak yourself to resonate at that pitch too.

This is the fundamental of relationships. When the person in front is angry, we also become angry and when someone makes you happy, we smile. That implies to all emotions. But, when we are in control of our emotions, the level at which the frequency of our emotions vibrate is not determined by external circumstances. That’s when we find balance between the inside and the outside.

If we are truly capable, we can create a semi permeable membrane around us where we can filter in the stimuli that dictate the way we behave. That capability of non-reaction to circumstances and people is the ultimate freedom.

This is the time when you find yourself at home with your own self rather than finding shelter in someone else. We all have a scared space in us, where we feel at peace within ourselves. But we do not access it often even though that’s freely available. If we start to visit that space in us by any means or channel we become a vehicle of our own happiness.