I had the good fortune of being born to a Meetei father and a Kuki mother. My mother was not accepted readily by my orthodox paternal grandmother. She considered my mother as "Sengdabi jaat" (**Unclean Caste**) as she was a christian, to top it all....a "Meat Eater" ..... to boot!!

She made me change into a set of kitchen clothes to enter to get a drink of water from the kitchen Sanabun(**Vessel**). Gosh! how I used to hate that orthodox practice of my grandma!!

The next time I visited her I decided to stay thirsty than go through that change-over stuffs. Over the years, I have noticed that my grandma has had a change in her attitude, methinks its probably due to a number of inter-community marriages in that village.

That kind of shut her up for her bias towards my mom being a Christian. She had to encounter a Tangkhul Mou(**daughter-in-law or Wife**not actual translation) of her best friend next door!! And mind you... This lady too, was a Christian and a "Meat Eater" ...to boot..!!

We were very much itching to see her reaction when that Mou came along in that household next door. I saw her with her friend huddled in that Shumang(**Front Courtyard**) corner discussing about their next move over this influx of such Mous.

All I heard was their frantic cries of "Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna Loire, Loire, Loina Pum Mang Mangle Leikai-se" (**This locality is goin down the tubes!**colloquially speaking).

We gleefully sang hallelujah...Amen! And after sometime again there was another Kom Mou.. in that village........"HMMM....for us all, Leela Nungaiba Houre(**fun is going to start now**) and ..its getting better and better!!" My mom had now more company and she wont be alone no more in that colony of different Mous!!

I was the eldest in a family of six sisters and two brothers and so I had an enormous family responsibilty to shoulder as was expeceted though unspoken out loud!! We spoke both languages of my parents in the house but my dad never did learn to speak Kuki and yet! he knew all the cusswords of it!! Golly Jee, Isn't that strange!!

My parents were poor as a Church mouse and they could not afford to educate us that much but made sure at least we completed our high school. For them, that was the ultimate as they themselves did not have any education beyond middle school.

My mother would toil hard to feed us all while my father was very depressed from his business running out. All his fair weather friends deserted him and was nowhere to be found anywhere near him. He used to lavish all of them with cigarettes, drinks or any cash they needed any time and my mother would get so upset at him for his charity towards these good-for-nothings!!

And he would always justify himself by saying "Eeswar Leiri(**God is there**) ....and that it would be okay". My mother would fume and and rage at him but no, he never cut the tie with those guys. She would always counter him by asking "Where is your Eeswar and all your so called good friends, now that we need food and other necessities of life ? "

It was a very upsetting situation for her as she was the only one who was more concerned about the family than him. I think he was in denial himself and did not want to be plagued by family responsibilty!!

My mother was the main backbone of the family and I still remember her hard work and the tough mentality she had when she had to encounter crisis after crisis in the family!! I used to help her out with taking care of my siblings while she did the household chores.

Now I am just wondering... why did they decide to have so many kids if they were going though hard times? Well, it was a taboo subject and who am I to say that to my own folks!! I used to remember my father always cribbing/crying to his friends about not having an older son who could assist him in his trade!!

He would then always self-pity himself ..." Hey!! Eeswar, Nang Kadaida Leibage? Ichanupa Amatang Leiram Labadi Ko....!!" (**Dear God, please let me have a son **) I would have loved to tell him at that time ..."Ichanupa(**My Son**).....my foot!! " Forgive me father , for my rantings now!!! May your soul rest in peace!!

But could he not have taught me that trade or what!! I wonder !! Our society puts so much emphasis on sons in families and I think my father was no different than anyone in his yearning for a son!! But hey!! for us daughters after daughters arrived and yet my father still thought ...maybe.... just maybe...a son would be coming soon in our family!!

No offense to any fathers out there....!! but my father's yearning for a son made me ponder .."does he really think sons and daughters can be manufactured like in a factory by choice!!" Daughters too are as good as sons in every way!!!

I had so much resentment against him all throughout my growing up years, for all his cibbing/crying to all his friends about my not being born as an older son to assist him in his trade. He would be turning in his grave to hear all what I am saying now. Again may his soul rest in peace!!!Amen!! We made peace with each other before he passed away a month ago.

All my paternal uncles and aunts are very loving and caring and it was so much fun to play with my cousins. They know how my grandma is and they always pull her legs no end about her orthodoxy. She loved to sit by the freshly cowdung scrubbed ground around the Tulsibung (**basil plant**) in the afternoons to eat her lunch.

And Boy!! I remember the time when one of my younger uncle Kaka Tombi would place a bundle of chicken meat wrapped in a banana leaf near the Tulsibung to make it look like a Prasadi (**holy offerings**) so that she could open it when she goes there for her Holy lunch.

He would then announce to us of her arrival from the Pukhri(**pond**) after her bath. We would gather inside the house and watch the unfolding of the events from there. She would come walking on a pair of rubber Khurum (**Sandals**). As if those were 'Gucci' or 'Prada' brands!!

We waited with bated breathe what she would do next! She sits crossed legged at her Tulsibung and first of all opened that freshly wrapped Prasadi and then all hell broke loose after that!!

She cussed all her sons for polluting her!! It was a treat to watch her seething in anger !! We had a great laugh inside the house. Of course Kaka Tombi ran for his dear life!! Because we saw granny looking for a stick to reward my uncles!!

She looked everywhere in the nook and corners of the house but nowwhere could she find any of the culprits! She kept cussing them all the while...!! She went again to the Pukhri (**pond**) for another bath to cleanse her of the pollution. She was sprinkling water all the way to the house from the Pukhri.

To this day we still remember that prank of my uncle and joke about it and laugh. Granny would still cuss at that memory!! She is very old now yet still alive and kicking and has become a good sport now!!

In 2005 when I visited her, she said that I was free to eat any kind of stuffs I wanted...She did not want to pollute her mouth by mentioning the word... "Meat" ... so she just indicated it by actions. All of us had a great laugh!!

Now she calls my mom "Mema". Gone are the days of that "Sengdabi"(**Unclean**) label!!

To be continued............!!