Dear E-pao Webmaster,

This is apropos to the article "With Love To My 'Non-Manipuri' Sisters!" by The_Inquisitive. The author views on the subject of Manipuri girls marrying a Non-Manipuri boy and at the same time, the feeling of what the Manipuri girl will think in their future life, are excellent. This article is a revelation!

After reading this article, I recollect a Manipuri girl who married to a Lahualli boy from Lahual & Spiti District of Himachal Pradesh. In the beginning, she met and falls in love with the Lahualli boy in Delhi and thought; they will survive their whole life in the pose backyard of Delhi. However, as destiny lurked, she landed on to the Lahual & Spiti District of H.P. In this remote area of H.P. she has to cope up with all the traditional 'Patu Dress', headgears, bangles, nose piercing, rearing sheep's, face severe cold temperature, inadequate school for children, no toilet or latrine, etc. etc. Lahual is so remote that for nearly 6 months of the whole year it is inaccessible by any route. On my recent visit to Lahual, I met her and she was so delighted to see me. Giving me a hot cup of tea she weep and acclaimed, "this is my fate and I blame it to my past reincarnation". I ask her whether she visited Manipur; she answered stammeringly, "only thrice during my eight years of marriage". I felt pity on her and ask whether she like to have any Manipuri eatables. She said she like 'Umorok', other eatables of Manipur are restricted. The Lahualli thought that people from N.E. eat dog meat, beef, worms, insects, snakes etc. etc. Even if her husband tried to convince other people, they still have the stigma of such things. She has now three children, but her in-laws forced not to send the children to schools at Manali and others nearby towns.

This is just a meeting of an unfortunate Manipuri woman, but to me, I assumed there might be many more of them who have been put to misery after their marriage to Non-Manipur. However, there are also many fortunate ladies who are married to well to do Non-Manipuri family, but the question by The_Inquisitive have some thing to be thought of. We know very well about the present situation of India of how in-laws tortured their daughter in-laws for meagre things. I am doubtful that this thing does not happen to Manipuri woman marrying a Non-Manipur man. Perhaps, they concealed it from the rest of us.

Of course, we know the courage of Manipuri women, but that courage should not make them miserable in their whole life by not revealing the facts of how she is leading her life. Rather, she should come forward and tell the world the merits and demerits, so that something can be learn by our younger generations. To me (layman), I think that most of them are not happy; even if they are happy also, they seems to have some feeling of dissatisfaction. Yes, it is true; human being never feel satisfied, but how about sharing ones obscurity together in a family to forget the hindrances? I think this is also part of the life. Here, I will be honest to tell the fact that one of my aunty married to a Punjabi and another one to a Bihari, also my uncle got married to a U.P. woman. In these cases, my Punjabi mama is in Manipur, totally discarding the Punjabi belief and doing petty business and my second Bihari mama has been missing for the last 18 years or so. My uncle is a very high-ranking officer; he is a drunkard, full of sadness on his face all the time, hard to crack nuts type with fallen eyelids. All of them had never seen or shared with grief the passing away of our close relatives in Manipur.

Finally, I hope my above experience and the facts will not directly affect or hurt anyone's feeling or sentiment. I am just intended to narrate only the fact that I have seen. This article by The_Inquisitive has made me recollect all these past memory and it makes me open my eyes. I hope, it is high time for our women to concentrate and understand the meaning of 'losing of gene pool', 'hybridisation', 'cultural changes', 'economic bankruptcy', 'brain drain' etc. Today, indigenous tribes of NE are in the verge of extinction (National Geographic, August 1999), so why not we do something to preserve it?

I wish all my Manipuri sisters who married to Non-Manipuri to lead a blissful and happy married life.

-- Khwairakpam Tomba