Pandemic Parodies

Free Thinker *

The latest heart fondering post I have just gone through in a diaspora platform - "Eikhoidi Covid su import touj aroi, Pabung Biren gi pukning su chingsin jaroi adubu ngari di khara khara thabiraku".

Perhaps they are committed people who do not want to convert the Greenland to Redland.

Broadly there are two types of people, one who wants to leave the motherland and another who wants to live for the motherland. Both are patriots, no doubt about it. The one who wants to live for the motherland have comeback and are helping us to develop natural 'herd immunity'.

There are hundreds of thousands of messages or posts relating to pandemic pass-time or lockdown time-pass. The one that just struck me a few days back, was about the social distancing norm, now it has been reduced from 2 meters to one.

If you remember in the initial stage of the epidemic it was only one meter or 3 feet. Within a month or so it was increased to 2 meters or 6 feet.

Now the police, district authorities and other law enforcing agencies are tired and confused; these days they simply tell people to maintain social distancing accordingly to their convenience.

WHO never defines social distancing between couples. They themselves are doing it voluntarily particularly among those who have been living together for 30/40 years.

All over the world an unending research is going on Covid and Corona. One prominent State leader says it affects the mongoloids very little. If it is true it will have far reaching diplomatic implementations and might change the entire geopolitics of the world.

Another finding says it will infect 85 % of the people mildly, and they may not know they are infected. Only 5 to 10% may require hospitalisation. Another encouraging news is that vaccine will be made available within a few months.

Italy may be the first one to use the vaccine. Most probably we are getting 3/4 vaccines in the near future. Whether an Indian vaccine will surface or not, only time will tell. I believe we are also almost there.

I don't understand the rationale that we are maintaining physical distancing at the airport but inside the aircraft the norm changes. I am confused whether we follow the scientists or economists.

Perhaps we follow scientists at the ground level and economists on the higher plane. Then allowing a crowd of 50 in a marriage and 20 mourners for a funeral is again based on fussy logic. How can one be so sure that the 51st or the 21st will create a problem.

Number is again creating uneasiness or utter confusion. Mandirs and Mosques are going to open, can we restrict the number of devotees. The most baffling logic is the night curfew, who says Covid is more active at night.

One stunning but prudent query came from an innocuous citizen to a Chemistry Prof asking whether alcohol part of the sanitizer can be extracted separately, if so please tell me the process.

The Prof said, it can be separated, but it is dangerous as it is going to be a highly combustible process, it requires a good lab and Sound technical expert. The enquirer further requested the Professor to do the needful for him because he admitted that he is having a collection of nearly 37 pretty big bottles of sanitizers.

RK Laxman, the famous cartoonist, once said," I stopped making cartoons of politicians after cartoons became politicians". He was very insightful in his assessment of issues and political developments.

We really miss him in this pandemic period. His cartoons used to carry the right message of course with humour. Today in the country, one leader after another tries to open up the lockdown because of immense economic pressure.

If we open more and more there will be chances of having more trouble and more fatalities. In the name of saving the economy how many people we are going to heaven, only Covid knows.

In this pandemic," we are threatened from all sides, from the sky - cyclones, on the ground - Covid, under the earth - earthquake, at home - spouse; but your Aarogya Setu still says you are safe".

"If you have one wife, she will fight with you; if you have two wives they fight for you".

These are some of the funny posts we have received in this trying time. One may call these mysogenic but I must say these are pandemic parodies. Enjoy this one also -"A mother beats up her daughter because she was drunk". Who was drunk - mother or daughter?

I simply asked an officer about the amount of fines collected from those who violated the lockdown rules or curfew. He said, you are grossly mistaken, we simply arrest them and they are 'fine' not 'fined'.