My personal Woes

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Manipur under Fire ... :: Pix - Pintu Oinam

My mind is full of woes....wonder where to begin with...what to write as well as what not to write! full of woes Shall I comment on the On Going Economic Blockade or write about the deplorable conditions of common man like me and the others, who are affected by the economic blockade which comes too often in our state, not being enough by one day strikes and bandhs?

Laymen are often left to fend themselves amidst all the chaos; it's almost like an endless struggle for existence where it has become "angam angambana chanaro" like situation. Nobody really cares how our next neighbor survives, for how can we, when everybody has been forced to become a keen participant in the survival war.

Or should I write about the 'paper leak' (is it too strong to use this word 'leak' here or shall I omit it because of fear) of MCS, TET exams! Or keep myself busy searching for universities and schools which have a reputation for giving high marks so that my future generations won't have to lose an opportunity in the hands of someone equally eligible with herself/himself or someone less capable, just because she/he came from a very generous university or school and my own from a school or university which prioritize to give marks according to the norms of educational dogmas.

Or should I write about the 'Price List' of Jobs like SI, ASI, MCS and many other such government jobs which have indeed become a sort of 'open job auction, given to the highest bidder'!. But of course, how can I forget to mention that some very very few are selected without any single influence from Bureaucrats, Some Specific Teachers, Ministers, Government Officials and Other powerful people.

Should I comment on Bureaucrats and Ministers, who never read what we write, defy our voices and exert their whims even against the best interest of 'their' public?. Or write about our dying faith in our media/newspaper because sometimes it's confusing to sort out if they are with us i.e. the public or with the government.

Or should I write about the Electricity problem in Manipur? In some states, with no big water bodies like the Loktak Lake, with citizens not even bothering to pay their bills but still the public get adequate supply of electricity. Here I have to pay Rs. 410 by default every month whether we get electricity or not.

I never had the luxury of watching two movies consecutively in HBO channel in Manipur. And in the darkest hour , the fool I am, I wait for the rain to come and fill our great loktak lake thinking that it would help in generating more electricity for our consumption. Notwithstanding all these, I always remind myself to pay the electric bill in time and often run out to check whether the 'micro' transformer in our leikai is shortcircuited 'which happen every week' and my heartfelt sympathy goes to our micro transformer which have had enough of caring the loads of thousands of houses since the past several years. And every day I end my day with one thought on my mind, "Don't listen to any excuses, just demand electric power, your one of the most basic amenities for development"

Or should I write about the various unforeseen incidents and misfortunes that happen to northeast people living outside Manipur, the endless debate on the topics of unacceptable treatments rendered to people from our region specially women, or should I write about the thin line between patriotism and terrorism, about looters (in lakhs), extortion in the National Highways, gundaism by the childrens of rich & powerful people. Or write about those who act GOD with their guns and bombs.

Or am I to write about the relations between the hills and valleys, their corrupted politically motivated leaders, or write about center's divide & rule policy in our states.

Or should I write about the improper rules and regulations regarding OBC certificates, fake OBC certificates and the unending court case, or write about those fake employees; then what about those employees who got job through paisa pijaraga, aren't they fake too? or write about fake encounter, misuse of force & power, untraceable and missing people, murder, kidnap ,rape or about Anna Hazare's famous Lokpal bill and what it can possibly can do for the benefit of our state, and with the same mistrust on the 'great' man himself who recently politicize himself, thus going against his famous Gandhian proclamation.

All the above woes are exaggerated by those problems intrinsic to almost every state in India, the non availability of life saving drugs and fake medicines, children dropping out of school (but I worry not, Right To Education is here and we will see the results soon, I believe our Government), the brain drain of students who leave their own birthplace behind for better education and environment etc.

No matter how hard you toil day and night, your fruit for labour are not paid in timely manner. Salaries are rewarded only after a long impending wait of 3 to 6 months (very normal) or even a year. And what little we deserve to get, comes only after being deducted or donated for reasons or to sources unknown. It's almost like work's labour lost.

And what's more astonishing than this is the deduction of welfare funds, mis-management and lack of accountability when it comes to various welfare schemes and projects. Owing to this, many a times, such schemes and projects fail to reach the grassroot level. So should I write about this?

Last but not the end, should I write about myself as a perfect example of a confused youth of modern day Manipur, someone who had grown up amidst all these chaos and disheartening events of everyday life, someone who have to face everyday's struggle, like, a boss with 'big mouth' who never appreciates you no matter how hard you work or how good you are with your job, financial problems, someone with big dreams but with fear in mind because of the changing modern society of Manipur with big slogans for modernity but with an inner force working its way to bring it back to barbarism.

Or should I lament on myself for being a perfect example of those people in our society who knows the wrongdoings and doers, yet couldn't do much because of fear or because of various circumstances or should I include myself in oiraroi, yararoi, kanararoi, apangba tani people.