PRESIDENTIAL ORDER NO. UY/JFMN/USM/2003
PUPPET GOVERNEMENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF MANIPUR USM)
IMPHAL SQUARE
August 19, 2003

Pursuant to my Presidential Order dated August 15, 2003 and the subsequent Referendum conducted in the E-Pao Chat Room on August 16, 2003 (which I lost!!), I, The_Inquisitive, the undeclared President of the United States of Manipur (USM), do hereby solemnly order and humbly issue the following Orders toward achieving a rogressive,economically viable, secular and an equally unequal Republic of the United States of Manipur:-

1. That,having examined and conducted sufficient due diligence on the movement of stars and after consultation with all my wives, I hereby declare myself as the undisputed President of the United States of Manipur for LIFE and authorize myself to constitute a core team of Ministers for ruling the United States of Manipur 'single-handedly'.

2.That I accordingly constitute the following Council of Ministries, who shall hold their offices solely at my pleasure and whose appointment, dismissal, remuneration and other conditions of service shall be completely at my disposal and my whims and fancies, AND allocate the work portfolios as under:-

a. Mr. Elangs Chenny (Dick Chenny" effect) - Vice-President in charge of Ministries of Romantic Sciences and Fashion Technology, Unhealthy Medical Practices, Moreh Karbar and Narcotics Commerce,Taliban Arts and Culture, Ngari - Soijin Globalization and Development.

b. Ms. Mystery Rocca (Christina Rocca" effect) - Federal Minister in charge of the Ministries of Mysterious Events, Misinformationand Wrong Communication, Tours and Travels, Women's Welfare,Crime bye women against Men.

c. Mr. Psycho Powell (Colin Powell" effect) - Federal Minister in charge of the Ministries of Psycho and Electric Shock Treatment, Sajiwa Jail, Graveyards and Cemeteries, Wild Animals.

d. Mr. Kiran Condoleeaza (Condoleezza Rice effect) - Federal Minister in charge of the Ministries of bad Hospitality and shabby Treatment, Sewerage Plants, Bathroom Sciences, Shekmai and Fayeng Development, Singju and Boras promotion.

e. Mr. Neon Rumsfeld (Donald Rumsfeld" effect) - Federal Minister in charge of the Ministries of Nuclear Attacks, Police Excesses, Abusive Language and Human Rights Violation.

f. Mr. De_Javu Tyson (Mark Tyson" Effect) - Federal Minister in Charge in charge of the Ministries of Keku Lotpi, Dhang Dhang Kappi, Cheitek Kotpi, Wa Kangjei, Yubi Lakki, Chekkai Thombi, Marble Shannaba and other Lampak Games and Sports.

g. Ms. Panacea Thatcher Margaret Thatcher" effect) - Federal Minister in charge of the Ministries of A Foreign Affairs, Eve Teasing, Beauty Parlors, Fashion Shows, Rurulisation of urban areas.

h. Mr. ROCK Jackson (Michael Jackson" effect) - Federal Ministry in charge of the Ministries of Rock Sciences and Pop Technology, Leirak Khullak Wakai Ngangba, Restaurant Designing.

3. That without prejudice to the above allocation of portfolios, I, in my capacity as the President of USM, retain all the powers to overrule any of my Cabinet Ministers, scold and rebuke them in public and fire them at my complete discretion.

4. That if any of my Ministers is found indulging in any unlawful activity or act against my whims and fancies, the Minister concerned shall be couriered to Guantanamo Bay" as a part of the WAR AGAINST TERROR".

5. That the Swearing ceremony for all the Ministers shall be held at my Sumang, Imphal Square at 12.00 (midnight) on September 31, 2003 and all the above-mentioned persons are requested to come dead drunk at least one hour before the ceremony.
ALL ARE ACCORDINGLY ORDERED AND ASKED TO COMPLY WITH PRESDENTIAL ORDER.

Sd/-
THE_INQUISITIVE
PRESIDENT FOR LIFE
GOVERNMENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF MANIPUR
IMPHAL SQUARE, UNITED STATES OF MANIPUR

cc:- All the citizens of the United States of Manipur (USM)