Where are you from? That's a perennial question I always chose to duck. Perhaps Silchar. Perhaps Shillong. Perhaps both.

It's an answer that lacked a conviction. I was born in Silchar, brought up in Shillong and Gauhati and now work in faraway Delhi. Manipur would have been lost in a field of imagination had it not been for three fleeting trips - an official tour and two others coerced by matters of the heart!

Call it an unfortunate upbringing where the cosmopolitanism of cultures has left me void of an identity that I can pin point to and assert. If Joseph Conrad was to pick his model for "the existential crisis" he was obsessed with, I would have fitted the bill, oh so well.

And the void persisted...caught in the trappings of a culture industry and an underlying consciousness ingrained as a kid. An oft-repeated "They are Manipuri Meities" and "We are Cachar Meiteis" was a refrain that seeped into memory. The difference I could never fathom, but affinity to Manipur was something I could not immediately establish.

But the feelings, perception changed with time as I moved further and further away from home, from my own people, my culture, my ethos. As I met another Meitei along life's winding road, I realised it didn't matter to me where he came from. The fact that he recognised "ishing", "thawai", "numit" with the same fervency I did was enough to strike a chord and touch my Meitei sensibility.

All the differences perceived as a kid seemed nonsensical at once. I could argue within myself that geographical barriers could not differentiate people who recognised the same sight, sound and smell of a culture only identifiable as one. And it's unimaginable what the sweet sound of your mother tongue can do, when you are part of that motley group in an overly crowded world.

And having a popular surname made the conquest of happiness easy. So what if it is the tongue-in-cheek "Lazy Ram" for my non-Meitei friends or "kill a Laisram first before you kill a snake" adage from my compatriot. I won't re-invent this one!

Cut to Silchar. There's a perceptible change there too. In my paternal village of Ramnagar Tuko, the dance troupes, and shumaang-lila import from Imphal is something avidly followed. For the people there it is a process of assimilation into mainstream Manipur. Latest 'adhunik' songs rent the air, women discuss 'maroop', the trends in 'phi' and jewellery and tradition zealously guarded against their non-Meitei surroundings. And if Jiribam is a perfect amalgamation of Meiteis of the two states, Lakhimpur, my maternal village, now a town, is not far behind. Here the fashion is more Paona Bazar, the accent more Keishamthong.

And as mini Meitei societies expand like the diaspora the world over, I haven't after all missed out so much on the culture bit. Without going into the history of history, we haven't let time ossify our lives... into oblivion... amid myriad cultures..., but let "yaoshang", "sajibu cheirouba" and "lai harouba" keep the hearth and tradition burning.

No other culture arouses so much nostalgia. Call it the lay musings of an unknown Meitei!