Making The Halves Better
Status of Manipuri women
- Part 2 -

Seram Neken *

A Manipuri woman :: Pix - Gyanand Naorem

The sex-worker-turned-housewife who migrated to the heart of Imphal city out of necessity is residing at rent somewhere in Imphal along with her two daughters. Her only dream is to see her siblings complete matriculation and get suitable jobs at any agency so as to survive in this highly materialistic world. She wished her present HIV status would not dash her purpose of living.

A number of excluded women have turned to sex work due to economic necessity, social unrest, communal hatred, irresponsible male behaviour, dearth of earning avenues, increasing immorality among both the male and female folks, lack of recreational room in society, absence of work culture among the males etc. These are a few clear examples of social exclusions facing the women of Manipur, the north eastern state of India bordering Myanmar.

Of course, the status of women in some creamy layers of Manipuri society nowadays is considerably improved. Ladies role in important seminars, workshops and functions which was generally limited to badge-pinning of VIPs, bouquet presentations and tea distribution, has now widened to participation in discussions and deliberations with the appearance of a number of women intellectuals, journalists, social workers, politicians and responsible officials. Women obviously no longer remain backward and downtrodden. At some circles, the status of women is almost at par with the opposite sex.

In families, in workplaces, government offices, colleges, schools, universities etc., women play greater role and take greater responsibility than men. In middle class families of Manipur, many men are doing domestic works like the women in order to harmoniously maintain the family. Today, both the parents are made to engage their time and energy at the maximum in upbringing children. No wonder, men begin to cook food, wash clothes, clean the floors and teach the children to assist their better halves. Roles of men and women have almost become the same in family maintenance.

From intellectuals, scholars and teachers to doctors and engineers, from journalists, columnists and news anchors to security officers and administrators, from artists and poets to sport stars, from politicians and social workers to successful entrepreneurs; there is no dearth of Manipuri women occupying responsible positions. Present day Manipur has given birth to bright ladies – it is proud that Manipuri women have entered in the Indian Administrative service, other than the state civil services and state police services. Manipur University has a number of women professors, associate professors and so on, besides a host of lecturers teaching in colleges and schools. In reputed private schools, lady teachers take a big share as compared to men counterparts.

A number of Manipuri ladies are also serving as Doctors in state and outside hospitals. Young Manipuri ladies are also serving as responsible positions in multi-national companies outside the state and even abroad. There are also lady news reporters, sub-editors, news readers, anchors who are in media houses of the state. In politics and social service, we have enough number of women holding responsible positions. Manipuri women are also sitting as Judges and Magistrates, besides a number of lady advocates in various Law courts of Manipur. The picture, however, is not all rosy everywhere. There are still reports of domestic violence, coercion, rape and atrocities against women.

When a married woman indulges in illicit extra-marital sexual relationships with other man, she is ostracized by the family, relatives, locality or society at large. However, in case the same thing happens to a man, he is accepted by the society. Even if the man brings home second wives to the family, the society does not resort to punish him. Hence, no matter whether the act committed is socially sanctioned or not, the treatment meted out to women is much more contradictory to that done to men.

The mother, a woman, who prepares food in the family, always attaches priority in feeding the husband and the sons. When the boys finish their dinner, the mother will eat with the daughters the rest of the items - no matter it is enough or not for them. Most women have the mentality to treat girls as inferior to the boys. Feeding, clothing, educating and health care for women or girls are often considered as secondary tasks as compared to those for men.

Traditionally, women in Manipur face exclusion in almost all sectors right from the domestic chores to the social platforms. Women in Manipur households are usually identified as 'Chaga Chaba' (eating the unwanted over-baked rice) to 'Aremba Chaba' (eating the remains) in the traditional Manipuri families. The society has wrongly modeled a picture of good women as submissive women. Traditionally, there is the male preference in every walks of life starting from expecting a new baby to decision making in the family.

The society even relies on a mentally unsound man rather than on a cautious woman. When a man and woman together do something which is against the norms of society, fingers are pointed more to the woman even though both are part of the act. Women are often discriminated in decision making process although her role is considered important in it. Although women in Manipur have become more assertive nowadays, they are still under represented politically. In spite of all the glories, Manipuri women at large still face discrimination and exclusions. Solution lies in encouraging participation and empowerment of women. Male folks should be equally empowered to enable them to swallow their pride and accept the need for equality with women. Women should be fully equipped to meet the challenges. "Martial arts should not be taken up only as a sport. I urge all women to take up martial arts so that they can defend themselves to some extent...." This is what Boxer Olympian Mary Kom from Manipur once appealed to all women of the country in the wake of burgeoning tragic gang-rapes and murders in India in recent times.

It's indeed true that women should be fit enough – both emotionally and physically to protect themselves against male brutality. Mentality of Indian males has drastically become inferior to that of animals, as animals do not indulge in assaults and rapes of their females. Rather, animals treat their female counterparts with due regard and respect. Rampant incidents of molestation, rapes and murders of women in the country and Manipur state have been due to degrading human values and immoral psyche of the males.

Feeling the strong need to politically empower the better-halves of the community, the Constitution of India has made provision for seat reservations for women in local bodies' elections. The ideal is that women will have their say in governance, they will advocate their needs and they will strive for their fulfillment. However, the reality is that men still take part in huge power sharing behind the women reservations theory. Powerful men are putting up their wives for the fray, so that they exercise the power behind their wives. There is need to make rational use of constitutional provisions.

Discrimination of HIV infected people in Manipur society is not a new story. The stigma and discrimination attached to HIV infected people are due to ignorance about the disease by the general people. When the ignorance and misconception surrounding the HIV and AIDS menace is removed, when we all realize that HIV virus is not transmitted via social gatherings, we will not discriminate infected people.

When we avoid the thinking that HIV and AIDS are behaviour related ailment, we will not stigmatise the HIV infected people. In spite of having the AIDS policies at national and state levels to prohibit any kind of discrimination against HIV AIDS infected or infected people, there are still cases of exclusion of the affected.

Behind every successful man, there is always a woman. But, it is not said that there is a man behind every successful woman. It obviously indicates a unique sense of responsibility attached to the other half of humanity. Educating a woman is educating the whole family. Empowering women is empowering the society. However, it is disheartening that most cases of domestic violence, coercion and mishandling against women in Manipur involve one or the other woman of the family. There is often a woman involved in perpetrating violence against another woman.

In families, localities and society at large, a woman often try to subdue another woman. Instead of sustaining and forgiving her gender counterpart, a woman tries to suppress and depress a woman. Women issues are perpetrated mostly by women, against women. Women themselves should take greater role in empowering themselves than the men. Until and unless women fully appreciate their own folk in the society, one half of the humanity will not get relief from atrocities and crimes.

Concluded...