You Know You're Living In The '00s When...
1. You have five passwords, but can only remember one.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in
years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your
family of three.
4. You e-mail your buddy who works at the desk next to
you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends
is that they do not have e-mail addresses.
6. When you go home after a long day at work you still
answer the phone in a business manner.
7. When you make phone calls from home, you
automatically push "9" to get an outside line.
8. You've sat at the same desk for four years and
worked for three different companies.
9. Your company's welcome sign is attached with
Velcro.
10. Your resume is on a diskette in your pocket.
11. Your biggest loss from a system crash was when you
lost all of your best jokes.
12. Your supervisor doesn't have the ability to do
your job.
13. Contractors outnumber permanent staff and are more
likely to get long-service awards.
14. Board members' salaries are higher than all the
Third World countries' annual budgets combined.
15. Interviewees, despite not having relevant
knowledge or experience, terminate the interview when
told of the starting salary.
16. Free food left over from meetings is your staple
diet.
17. Your supervisor gets a brand-new state-of-the-art
laptop with all the latest features, while you have
time to go for lunch while yours boots up.
18. There's no money in the budget for the five
permanent staff your department desperately needs, but
they can afford four full-time management consultants
advising your boss's boss on strategy.
19. Your relatives and family describe your job as "he
works with computers."
And the clinchers are:
20. You read this entire list, and kept nodding and
smiling.
21. As you read this list, you think about forwarding
it to your "friends."
22. You think your "jokes group" may have already seen
this list, but you don't have time to check so you
forward it anyway.
23. You got this e-mail from a friend that never talks
to you anymore, except to send you jokes from the Net.
24. This e-mail has 20 different disclaimer notes at
the bottom, telling you that the information is
confidential, but you forward it anyway.
Contributed by Lokanta B.
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