"One the one hand, you have schools that are run like shops, literally and figuratively, and on the other, you have a political and social atmosphere where mirth and genuine laughter have been abolished long ago" - Pradip Phanjoubam

With due regards to Thoubalites. But Okram Ibobi Singh has failed.

As the CEO of the state he's conked put. Witless. As the leader of the pack of the Mantris, his whip is, well, whipless. As a Home Minister, he's oblivious of where Home is. As an icon, he's made more buy luck than by grit or charisma.

Five years (damn them) or we say, a full-term, he's survived. History says it's a record. A record it indeed is. Under him, Manipur has become a hotbed of law-breakers, scamsters and thugs of all ilks. Thanks to him, the stage is set for 'Undergroundisation' of Manipur.

520.73 Crores. The Economics and Statistical Department says Rupees 520.73 Crores was lost during 2006-07 (till January 2007) due to bandhs and blockades. How many more shameful data the E & S people concealed we daren't conjecture. But we know one thing- that the figure appears more bloated in the face of Manipur being the lowest in the National Growth Rate record.

Sana Leibak recorded a dismal 4.9 per cent growth during the Tenth Five Year Plan period. For the statistically inclined, here's the real low-down: on account of Bandhs the loss per day is pegged at Rupees 754 Lakhs with Rupees 10,758 Lakhs as the estimated annual per capita loss. Our fame has indeed preceded us.

Perhaps the CV of the state should be in order to apply for reservation under the BIMARU category of states. If no category beneath it exists, that is. After slapping a Rupees 20 lakhs fine upon the BJP-Shiv Sena combo for holding a bandh inAmchi Mumbai, the Supreme Court declared,'look at London blast!

Did any party there further affect civil life by organizing bandhs? Bandh is not an answer to terrorism or a bomblast…' Kaan khol ke sunlo, bhaiyo bhen no.

11 not out. No, it's not the over-rated Dinesh Mongia's latest ODI score. In fact, were it related to cricket, it would have been more illustrious. 11 schools were razed to the ground even as many more are purportedly waiting in the wings.

The fact that something as secular as education should suffer this fate speaks volume of the circumstances in the state. Simply put, there's fire in the north and rapes in the south, and the perpetrators of the latter, unbeaten on two, thanks to the incompetent umpiring of the state.

33 per cent. Again, one might be taken into believing this as reservation for women in the LS. But over here, we have our very own indigenous application. 33 % refers to reservation, yes, but for a certain terror group in the PDS.

Mass famine already one foot inside the house and 33 % from Sangaiprou for terrorists? What a bountiful government we have. The question is- who is wearing the pants in home Manipur, the UGs or government?

13. In no way related to Michael Ballack's jersey. 13 represent the unit of crores embezzled in the now forgotten Head Pandit scam of the Education Department. It has been three years now that a House Enquiry Committee headed by C. Doungel was constituted to probe into one of the major widespread improprieties of the state in recent memory. Last heard, no noise.

88 Lakhs. Despite medical advances that has been demonstrated by slogans like "leprosy is curable" and that AIDS no longer that venomous, the bane of malaria is still a force to reckon with in Manipur.

Anti-malaria campaign is a perennial burden of the medical department. However, 88 lakhs worth of malaria medicine went missing at the Store of Malaria, Lamphel and that exactly was the last time we heard of it. So long farewell!

123:51. in other words, total medals: gold medals bagged by the state in the 33rd National Games at Guwahati, 2007. I guess a gold medal each for all those genuinely innocent souls who perished at the hands of the SFs or UGs or both in the past 12 months.

Thank god, there are sports lest Manipur's really gone. What with the Hindustan Time more or less declaring us the first failed state in India, no lesser feat either. Let the Mayangs yak what they fancy, no?

And yes, our medal tally is a tad too meager to speak for the total days of bandh during the same period. Though those upwardly mobile states could not even catch a sight of our tail in the medal tally.

356. The only viable analgesic for Manipuris is Article 356 of the Indian Constitution. Though not the panacea, it would at least give us a breather to stand and stare.

When was the last time you go for a peaceful evening walk around the neighborhood? And gas stations were meant to be opened for 24 hours, no?