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E-Pao! Wathi Jugai - Resume of Abosing

RESUME OF ABOSING

Subject: Resume of Abosing

Name: Eiga Abosing

Objective: To obtain a challenging position as a Crime Implementation Analyst (CIA) in Highways of Manipur

Education: MS (Criminal Sciences) , Virginia Prison for International Smugglers and the Unlawful(VPISU),August 1996.

Thesis: "On escaping from high security prisons like Alcatraz with minimal efforts"

BS (Crime Technology), Tihar Jail, India, August 1994

Project: 'Varied means for non-violent looting of passengers in NH 39 and NH 53 of Manipur'

Coursework: Cop Psychology, Plastic Explosives Technology, Bomb Controls and Timer Device Theory, International Smuggling and Drug Trafficking, Object Oriented Crime Design

Work Experience:

Research Assistant, LTTE Labs, Jaffna,Aug 1990-Aug 1991
* Worked on the prestigious Belt Bomb project
* Developed instant death cyanide capsules in orange, strawberry and mint flavors
  (Patent# 007,13,666)
* Converted a chinese/moreh toy pistol into a look alike AK 56.7
* Lab technician for printing 'fake' Indian Rupees.

Summer Internship:
Dawood Ibrahim and Haji Mastan Associates,Bombay, June1987-July1990
* Worked as a hitman and was responsible for many supari style killings
* Participated in election rigging in Bihar and made hafta collections
* Tested 'BS project' viability in NH 39 and NH 53 of Manipur under
   most unfavourable conditions.
* Helped 'cave alignment' project in Afghanistan

Honors:
* Won 1980 Gabbar Singh Memorial Award (given to child prodigies in crime)
* Member, IPKF (Indian Professional Killers Forum) student chapter

References:
* Dr. Veerapan , Roaming Faculty of South.
* Dr. Laloo Prasad , Gold Medallist in Digesting Everything, Bihar
* Dr. Charles Sobhraj, Full Time Prof.,Tihar Jail, New Delhi
* Dr. Chandra Swamy, Visiting Faculty Tihar Jail, New Delhi
* Dr. Dawood Ibrahim, Overseas Projects Manager,Dubai
* Er. Bin Laden, Cave specialist, Afghanistan

Non-Academic Activities:
* Listening Bhagabad Gita. Specially the quote
  "Koi marta nahin. Koi kisiko mar nahin sakta"
* Watching new Manipuri albums
* Chatting in e-pao.net under various names
* Cultivating 'ganja' plants
* Transparent plastic packaging of 'sekmai chamelei'


Warning: all the information are FALSE but if you still need assurance from me about it, please send your correspondece to me@nonexistant.com with a subject marked as "You are the greatest".


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