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E-Pao! Essays - Are You Shocked with Failure?

Dear Youngsters! Are You Shocked with Failure?

By: Shanjoy Mairembam *



Thanks to E-Pao, I'm receiving lots of good response from many youngsters & elders. These are responses to my earlier article titled "Dear youngsters, its time say - "Mom-Dad! I am here Na!". Some youngsters even enquired me about my next article.

Well, I would love to write articles that will have good impact directly on today's youngsters as I do feel that "Change is something that we can't stop". So, sharing of thoughts with the youngsters and creating a comfortable room for interactions among youngsters and the elders in the society is something I consider as a very important part of our lives. Today's youngsters are the future's budding jewels. Let me ask Dear youngsters who are in high schools and higher secondary schools… Are you shocked by the Failure in your Exams? Do you fear about the Future if you failed? Do you feel inferior when compared to your classmates & neighbors if you fail? I do acknowledge that Youngsters/students who got failed in their 10th Exam or 12th Exams are heart broken. Some might pick up wrong habits and in turn ruin their future, which could have been bright. Some even think of committing suicide & they do so at extreme conditions. This would apply to youngsters in colleges and Universities too. This will be the main issue that I will be trying to bring out via this article.

Yes! "Who will like to get failed in exams or any competition". We all want to win …just win… by hook or by crook anyhow. That is the motivation that we all humans have. I emphasized one factor in my last article that I would like to remind here "Thinking is something that makes people different; Great from Commoners". Our mentality keeps on developing from being a kid till the last breathe. When we are kids, we play here and there; never did we care what will happen in future or what are we actually doing. But as we grow, we begin to start dreaming and making goals in life. We are all social beings so we learn from the environment where we are being brought up; Incidents & moments that we come across while being teenagers; may be smiling ones, may be emotional ones, may be anything. All that finally make up what we are… our personality, how we decide our future plans, our life-style and many more. Well, I am only going to say something that will be helpful for you youngsters here though this article. So read on.

I too was once a kid like you and have gone though Days in high schools, higher secondary schools and college. Yes, my time and situations are not the same as now, I do agree. But, there are many things, which are still the same. The only difference is the mode of study and the year we study that too just different to some extent. Problems and issues are bound to come somehow or somewhere anytime in any field we are, in our lives. This doesn't happen to only to youngsters in high schools and higher secondary schools.

So now, let's try asking these few questions to ourselves. How do we can justify if we get addicted to some bad habits thereby spoiling our careers & lives and even committing suicide at the worst scenario, for failing in exams or any other competitive exams? Is there no other options left which is better and acceptable, not just to you but to your mom-dad and other family members? Are you sure that taking such extreme actions at the news of failure would silence the real fact that you have indeed failed? Can your dear ones bear the cost of loosing you once you have take up such extreme steps with whom you have shared your whole lovely life till now? Have you ever got a second thought that it's not just you who will be happy when you pass with flying colors in any exams, but the real pride will be your mom and dad who gave birth to you among their friends & the society they live. Are you the only guy or gal who failed this time and if not what are their stories? Are all the great people, whom we all respect & wish to emulate, been toppers in their respective high school and college? Will we not get any more chance to become like those great people, maybe not in the field we love to; but in some other way of career or lives? Do you feel that just failing in some exams is the end of life and you are not worth being called as a good guy or gal?

These same questions do apply to others too, but I do have a feeling that once we are in colleges and universities… we could at least define our lives properly and understand the meaning of life better.

So, coming back to the dear youngsters. Have you got any reasonable answers? Well, you will be having a lot of doubts. Some may be even be complaining that what do I know of the situation with you guys and gals there. You are right. Maybe I know nothing of you guys and gals there. But, I dare say, "If you feel correct of taking a wrong step after a failure, then, you are in fact the real failure, a real waste to your mom and dad, a real black sheep in your family". I feel pity for your negative behavior out of failure in exams. But why do you want to live on your whole life with the bad remark; and even if u choose the way which is wrong, that remark won't go off; Don't you ever wish to say to everyone that You too are a successful person once at least in life!!!

Yes! The person who is talking now, namely 'myself' has experienced failure in life. But never have I thought of myself as a failure in life. If I had not failed that time in the past, can I ever dream of being what I am today and what personality I have today? Today, I got the chance to say to my friends, my mom-dad, indeed I am not that bad in studies, not a black sheep in our family, not that inferior to others, Even those who used to talk about my failures in the past are now clapping their hands at the news of the little success that I got now.

Everyone around you are just viewers/audience who will there whether you win or fail. So, why do we hear what they talk about? Why should we be bothered about their comments of our lives and careers? We may be called STUPID today, who knows they called us the SAVIOUR tomorrow. Things do keep on changing. We all see and hear Good guys becoming bad. In contradiction, a Bad guy becomes saviors too.

Do you know that this year's Chennai's IAS topper didn't study in a college? Sangeetha, 27, does not have a formal college education, but she has come out with flying colors in the Civil Services Examination this year. Sangeetha ranks third in the state and 34th at the All India level. Her undergraduate and post-graduate degrees were through correspondence courses and her success proves that it's not where you study, but what you do with it that matters. A student of Kendriya Vidyalaya in Kalpakkam, Sangeetha went in for a vocational course after she cleared the Railway Recruitment Board examinations after Class 10. She began working as a railway clerk, but pursued correspondence courses in Commerce through Annamalai University. She later moved to ICICI Bank for a clerical post. But her ambition did not stop there. After emerging successful in the Group 2 TNPSC (Tamil Nadu Public Service Commission) exams, she began work at the employment exchange in Anna Nagar.

`I wanted to become an IAS officer even when I was in school. My parents and friends encouraged me,'' says Sangeetha. She says that group study with friends is an important part of preparing for the exams.

Her first attempt at the UPSC exam in 2000 failed. She did not clear the preliminary exams. In her second attempt, she went up to the interview level. In her third attempt, she failed to clear even the preliminary exam. In 2003 - her fourth attempt - Sangeetha emerged successful, with the chance of getting into the Indian Administrative Services in the state she chooses. ``Family support is necessary if you are a woman and want to compete with the best,'' she says….

So - why shall we feel pity for the failure we have today? Who knows it may be the path to my Bright future, which is going to be just only mine. As I say in my last article, "Choice is the only thing that is going to pull one forward or backward in one's career". Keep Faith and use your own hard work up to the maximum limit you have. It is not your fault then even if you fail. You did try with all your capacity. How can you dream of something beyond your capacity? But, you will get the fruit of what you did. The thinking is not about the number of hours that other students put into their study, it's not just the guidance that others get. It is true they will have the lead. But, the thinking is about how will you get the price of your hard work - the Medal that you wish to get in your career… with the knowledge you have… with the strength of study you have…. With the guides you have… with the background you have. It is all part of a society to have good, bad, success, failure … etc. Nothing is on Quota. You can win someday too, if you don't loose your faith and will power and the eagerness to win someday with hard work.

So, dear youngsters, Lets' dream today for the future when we will be holding the medal of our success and friends & dear ones' will be greeting us. No one is going to bother about the past. Present and future does make a change to the past… So let's not make someone mock at us for being running away from the failure… but let's make him or her greet us with a smile that we are the winners by working hard with faith again with a stronger motivation than before.




Shanjoy Mairembam is a Systems Engineer with Indian IT Giant firm - WIPRO Technologies, Bangalore
He can be contacted at shan_mairembam@yahoo.co.in

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